The U.S. economy gained 21,000 jobs in February.

Oops. Did we say the economy gained 21,000 jobs? Actually, the government hired 21,000 more people. But close enough.

And that is a kind of strategy, anyway. We'll all end up working for Disney, GE, Time Warner, or the government. Who needs more than three companies?

And while we're quetly trying to reclassify fast-food jobs as "manufacturing" jobs (well, we are building quite a burger!), lets go whole-hog and get rid of those arcane and confusing sectors like manufacturing, farm, and service.

Lets cut up the economy into realistic sectors, like:

• landscapers
• delivery men
• drug dealers
• rich kids with trust funds
• people who sell viagra and weight-loss pills over the internet
• security guards
• friends of the president who have sweetheart no-bid government contracts
• people who used to have a real job but now bounce between stultifying, unfulfilling part-time jobs that they'll probably quit in three months.

Then we'll see some serious job growth numbers.

And those people without a job? They are getting unemployment insurance, right? Well it sure seems like they are getting paid for something, so they must have a job. Lets count them as employed, too.

Damn! Full employment, Bush style.