Normally, people don't mess with me. In fact, people don't chat with me, ask me directions, or make small talk with me. I give off some vibe like I don't want to be bothered. I'm quite repellent, apparently.
Except, God knows why, when I'm buying a cup of coffee.
Maybe it is a function of the volume of coffee that I buy. I'm somewhere every morning. I always get the same thing (a large coffee with a shot of espresso). I guess familiarity breeds courage.
I've had similar problems in the past. First, a woman in a Starbucks got a little friendly, so I started going to the Starbucks across the street [No, I'm not Joking. This is New York, where, as in "Best In Show," Starbucks do open on both sides of the same street]. Some guy in that Starbucks took a hankerin' to me there. I couldn't win.
And it is happening again.
Lately, I've been getting a cup of coffee before I get on the train, at a cute little place where I live. It is particularly cute because these two older women run it, and they are always engaging in goofy banter. Great fun.
Anyway, I walk in and order a triple double parker (their name for a redeye). Normally, I don't actually have to order my drink. This one woman usually sees me come in and makes my drink before I can ask.
But today her partner got to me first. I ordered, she fixed the drink, and I paid for it.
But let me set the scene a bit more. These two women are a little older than I. I'm guessing early sixties. They are totally in shape, water-aerobics-every-day kind of sixty, though. No kidding. I hope to look that good at their age. But they are maybe 30 years older than I am. Ok. scene set.
As I'm paying for my drink, the woman who normally gets my coffee notices that I've snuck in. She sees that my coffee is already prepared.
She then says, "Oh darn, I wanted to do him," shoots me a lascivious look, and lets slip an evil cackle. No joke. And she continues to giggle as she fills another order.
This really caught me off guard. I do believe my penis shriveled slightly at the sound of her naughty giggle. Or my ass twitched. Either way something happened in the area of "my loins," something that made me feel funny.
Once again, I've been objectified by a coffee vendor. Just thought I'd share.
Except, God knows why, when I'm buying a cup of coffee.
Maybe it is a function of the volume of coffee that I buy. I'm somewhere every morning. I always get the same thing (a large coffee with a shot of espresso). I guess familiarity breeds courage.
I've had similar problems in the past. First, a woman in a Starbucks got a little friendly, so I started going to the Starbucks across the street [No, I'm not Joking. This is New York, where, as in "Best In Show," Starbucks do open on both sides of the same street]. Some guy in that Starbucks took a hankerin' to me there. I couldn't win.
And it is happening again.
Lately, I've been getting a cup of coffee before I get on the train, at a cute little place where I live. It is particularly cute because these two older women run it, and they are always engaging in goofy banter. Great fun.
Anyway, I walk in and order a triple double parker (their name for a redeye). Normally, I don't actually have to order my drink. This one woman usually sees me come in and makes my drink before I can ask.
But today her partner got to me first. I ordered, she fixed the drink, and I paid for it.
But let me set the scene a bit more. These two women are a little older than I. I'm guessing early sixties. They are totally in shape, water-aerobics-every-day kind of sixty, though. No kidding. I hope to look that good at their age. But they are maybe 30 years older than I am. Ok. scene set.
As I'm paying for my drink, the woman who normally gets my coffee notices that I've snuck in. She sees that my coffee is already prepared.
She then says, "Oh darn, I wanted to do him," shoots me a lascivious look, and lets slip an evil cackle. No joke. And she continues to giggle as she fills another order.
This really caught me off guard. I do believe my penis shriveled slightly at the sound of her naughty giggle. Or my ass twitched. Either way something happened in the area of "my loins," something that made me feel funny.
Once again, I've been objectified by a coffee vendor. Just thought I'd share.
posted by Eric Hancock at
5:51 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home