“Janet Jackson’s right boob has been taken into custody and sent to Guantanamo Bay for questioning,” Mr. Ashcroft told reporters in a Washington briefing. “We’d very much like to know what the boob knew and when it knew it.”

[...]

When asked about Ms. Jackson’s left boob, Mr. Ashcroft said that it is not a suspect at this time but that it remains “a boob of interest.”

[via BorowitzReport.com/]