Swimming with the Razorfishes

Saturday, April 12, 2008


A very large woman is in a coffee shop ordering a large coffee with two "splendor," half and half, and a little fat-free milk.

Monday, April 07, 2008


You walk into the Men's room at work. [Ladies, indulge me].

You hear the telltale click-clacking of someone typing on a Blackberry. Then, the sharp "crack" of plastic falling onto tile and said Blackberry is skating across the floor, finally coming to rest in the middle of the room. Six feet or so from the stall housing its owner. You hear a faint "damn" from behind a door.

What do you do?

Chuckle, certainly. But do you reunite the device with its owner? Do you kick it back under the stall? Do you dare to pick it up and hand it to the sorry SOB, your hand tentatively reaching under the cold, steel divider?

Or do you say to your co worker, rather more loudly than is necessary, "I'll give you $50 to piss on it?"

Someone please help me with this bit of workplace etiquette.

Sunday, April 06, 2008


I'm fascinated by the various was people pronounce the word "poem."